As my baby boy turns into a little boy I find my arms aching to hold onto him for as long as I can. As Zoe turns into a little girl, I find myself thinking more and more about how she was as a baby. As they grow from toddlers to children, I worry about the heart aches and trials that life will inevitably throw at them. I ache for the them and the bad things that they will have to experience in order to become stronger and truly live their lives to the fullest extent.
     
     As much as I would love to wrap them in bubble wrap and shield them from the world, I know that in the long run I would be doing them a disservice. I experienced the results of that kind of upbringing first hand. I was so sheltered that when I got out into the world for the first time, it knocked me on my ass. Being so unprepared was almost the end of me. I won't do that to my kids. While I won't expose them to anything before they're ready to face it, I'm not going to pretend that the harsh realities of the world don't exist.

   I would love to have another baby, but as things stand right now, I first need a bigger house and Travace has GOT to be fully potty-trained. I am not dealing with both him and a new baby in diapers! Been there done that Jack!

   Levi is at the Ballroom working tonight. I don't like to be alone with my thoughts this late at night. I have a tendency to dwell on negatives and can throw myself into either panic or depression and I'm not sure which is worse.

   Christmas is right around the corner already. Zoe keeps talking about it and how much she wants snow for Christmas. Trying to explain that Oklahoma rarely gets snow to a four-year-old isn't the easiest thing...in fact it's almost freaking impossible.

   Travace a sneakier little stinker than I had originally given him credit for being. Yesterday he comes up to me and starts counting. 1-4 and then 10-14! Then he holds up three lego blocks in one hand and three fingers on the other and says: "Three my Mommy. It's three!". He also knows his letters A-D apparently. Today he shouts: "EYE!" and then jabs me in the eye with his finger. He also has an obsession with Angry Birds, or as he calls them "Anger Burds". They have Angry Birds plush back-packs at the store, and when we went this morning he held one of the red birds and talked to it the whole time we were shopping. I guess we know what to get him for Christmas! I also know what theme to use for his birthday next May! lol